Balancing Work and Family

What has changed for families in the last decade?

• Most mothers with children under 1-year-old are employed
• Two working parents in most families
• Cost of quality childcare is a major family issue
• Eldercare is a major family issue
• Children have increased social activities (recreation is more managed by parents)
• Children under pressure to succeed
• Baby boomers approaching middle age
• Single parent households on the rise
• Children are stressed by their busy schedules (They have many places to be)
• What are some characteristics of work life in the 21st century?
• Longer commutes and telecommuting
• Downsizing: doing more with less
• Longer hours
• Technology: blurred distinction between on duty and off duty (cell phones, e-mails)
• Work settings more culturally diverse

How does someone know if there life is out of balance? What are the signs and symptoms?

• Feeling out of control/overwhelmed
• Change in sleep habits
• Feelings of guilt/inadequacy
• Increased alcohol consumption
• Change in appetite
• Irritability/mood swings
• Preoccupation
• Anxiety
• Chronic sadness
• Medical symptoms

How do we get out of balance?

• Expectations are unrealistic
• Demands are excessive
• Priorities are not set
• Ineffective (or no) family communication
• Change is not viewed as an option
• Support system is not adequate
• Warning signs are ignored or not recognized

What are some practical tips for achieving balance between work and family?

• Schedule family meetings
• Help children make choices about activities
• Prioritize activities: think before committing
• Weekly family calendar
• Meal share with friend of family member
• Swap baby-sitting responsibilities
• Pizza/take out
• Carpool
• Build leisure into routine
• Designate an “end-of-the-day” time
• Schedule chores with the family
• Catch stress before it catches you
• Ask yourself: “Will this new activity help me/my family to meet goals, be happier, healthier or more productive?”
• “Me” time for parents

How can I work with my partner to share the load of responsibilities?

• Sit down together at the end of every weekend to plan the week ahead.
• Chat about your day for a few minutes each evening and run through the events planned for the next.
• Try to manage your children’s lives equally.
• Let go of responsibilities your partner is taking on. Don’t try to control them so tightly, it looks like you would rather do them yourself.
• Try not to be over-critical of the way your partner carries out a task.
• Organize areas of responsibility so you each do the jobs that are the easiest and most enjoyable for you.

Helpful time management tips:

• Identify and get rid of energy and time wasters
• Eliminate needless “shoulds”
• Consider time trade-offs
• Delegate/share responsibilities when possible
• Make lists to organize available time
• Build in time for leisure
• Beware of tight schedules

How will I know when balance is achieved?

• Communication is good and consistent
• Priority needs are identified and met
• Goals are realistic and attainable
• Work and family time are distinct
• The “system works” now
• Room for flexibility and change
• Stress management is practiced
• General comfort and quality of life